stabla:


i went to my great aunts funeral today, which was interesting and sad because i found out so much about her. 
she got the first face lift ever in new zealand
she had a “glass act” (pictured above) where she would wash her face and body in broken glass and not get slightly scratched. when members of the audience tried, they were grievously injured.
she once hypnotized 500 people for fun and then asked them to go and stand on a highway, so that cars couldn’t pass. she got in a lot of trouble because the crowd got so large that there was a national traffic crisis.
her act included hypnotizing people into walking to work in their underwear, with their consent of course, and one of the men who had actually done it came to the funeral.
at her funeral all these people who had been in her act showed up and talked about how great she was, how she was gifted and crazy and i suppose i’m sad and happy about it.

stabla:

i went to my great aunts funeral today, which was interesting and sad because i found out so much about her. 

  • she got the first face lift ever in new zealand
  • she had a “glass act” (pictured above) where she would wash her face and body in broken glass and not get slightly scratched. when members of the audience tried, they were grievously injured.
  • she once hypnotized 500 people for fun and then asked them to go and stand on a highway, so that cars couldn’t pass. she got in a lot of trouble because the crowd got so large that there was a national traffic crisis.
  • her act included hypnotizing people into walking to work in their underwear, with their consent of course, and one of the men who had actually done it came to the funeral.

at her funeral all these people who had been in her act showed up and talked about how great she was, how she was gifted and crazy and i suppose i’m sad and happy about it.

(Source: artfucker1996, via paul-blart-molly-cop)

hiphopholistics:

codeinewarrior:

say those three words and i’m yours

Fuck The Police

(via tylerhoekley)

angfdz:

me: *has an opinion*

me: *realizes that my opinion is a result of my limited world view*

me: *stays in my lane*

(via tylerhoekley)

Tumblr: Racism is horrible!
user: yeah! it is!
tumblr: POC are mistreated!
user: yeah! it's so horrible!
tumblr: White people are horrible!
user: YEA- wait.....
tumblr: I HATE WHITE PEOPLE
user: wait what
tumblr: THEY ALL SUCK
user: i.......uh..
tumblr: Women are important.
user: oh! yes! they are!
tumblr: no matter what shape size or color!
user: yeah! youre all wonderful and great!
tumblr: men are pigs!
user: wait.......
tumblr: WE SHOULD TREAT THEM ALL LIKE IDIOTS
user: but-
tumblr: THEYRE ALL THE SAME.
user: but wait-
tumblr: Trans people are mistreated....
user: yeah...they are....
tumblr: its sick how people hurt them
user: that is sick. There's nothing wrong with trans people.
tumblr: Cis people are all horrible killers
user: but...but they're-
tumblr: fucking cis scum
user: you know....i dont feel comfortable with this
tumblr: what do you mean
user: well you're kind of bullying people-
tumblr: ITS NOT BULLYING
user: but-
tumblr: WE HAVE TO BE OPRESSED EVERY DAY. SO WE'RE ALLOWED TO CALL YOU NAMES
user: i dont think that's how that works-
tumblr: OOOOOOH YOU POOR OPRESSED WHITE CIS PERSON! YOU HAVE IT SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BAD!
user: thats not what i meant-
tumblr: DID WE HURT YOUR POOR LITTLE BABY FEELINGS
user: you're insulting-
tumblr: YOU DONT GET AN OPINION
user: .............
tumblr: by the way we love everybody! never bully! no hate! loving community! :)

perks-of-being-chinese:

little blood orange riding hood

(Source: perks-of-being-chinese, via trust)

magic-bowtie-dreams-221b:

thempress:

People look down on McDonald’s employees but fail to realize that if all these folks left McDonald’s and pursued “better careers”  your ass wouldn’t be able to get a McDouble with an Oreo McFlurry at 3am. 

You can’t demand a service while simultaneously degrading those who provide it for you. 

You can’t demand a service while simultaneously degrading those who provide it for you. 

(via asian)

raikagay:

remember like 2 years ago when christmas stopped feeling like christmas for some reason

(via fake-mermaid)

foxzes:

fakethistoyourgrave:

What’s the word for horny but not in a sexual way like I’m horny for Halloween but I don’t wanna fuck a pumpkin you feel

do u mean excited

(via troyesivan)

iswearimnotnaked:

when i was 9 i wrote a love letter to cole sprouse and closed my eyes and threw it out the car window thinking it’d magically find him and wow i did not understand the united states postal system 

(via trust)

catallenas:

kuueater:

doitsundere:

lionessjenna:

doitsundere:

image

sure little guy

image

image

image

image

image

nO

(Source: ureuhito2, via trust)

partner: you be the teacher ill be the student ;)
me: okay
me: write an essay on whether theatre architecture of a particular period always reflects that period's culture. i want it on my desk by monday
partner: oh no but... thats such a hard essay... is there anything i can do for extra credit? ;)
me: no
partner: but professor.... surely then i could... persuade you to extend the deadline...? ;)
me: no
partner: so... what do you want, professor?? ;)))
me: an essay on whether theatre architecture of a particular period always reflects that period's culture. on my desk. by monday

(Source: perrabasica, via sxlix)

legalmexican:

I only accept anon hate in size 12 Times New Roman double spaced MLA format

(via fake-mermaid)

penelopgarcia:

if they dont play ‘year 3000’ at least once on the new year’s of 3000 i will literally rise out of my grave and set everyone on fire

(via fake-mermaid)